Wow reading my last blog brought a tear to my eye. I remember it like it was yesterday what happened in 2014. I was in control and living in the moment for a while until "true" love swept me off my feet.
Where do I begin in 2015? I was talking about loneliness and complacency last year and I'm here in the same boat all over again. I hate it! It forces me to make drastic moves with myself but for some reason this time around I've decided to be still. Just be in these dire moments and just take it for what it is. Nothing more nothing less. I say this because last year I did make some changes for me. I wind up taking a side part time job that I enjoyed very much, made some new friends along the way, and earning extra cash. I was good. Before that I took some small trips to visit friends and even had opportunities to take advantage of these free trips that I had on my bucket list was great. 2014 had me open to new adventures and it really didn't kick in till I was dating the guy from my last blog.
I really did enjoy him. He taught me a lot about myself. Now that I look back on it he really did come into my life as a season to teach me something. To live in the moment. I lived in the moment but on a selfish end. I finally was at a place where I had consistent company and being spoiled and I was steadily busy doing my own thing. I was definitely living in the moment. Things were going well for us. There were minor things I wasn't satisfied with because I wanted more. Not so much more from him but just wanted something to show for in general in my life. I suppose planning trips somewhere, meeting close friends and family gave me something to look forward to. We didn't do much of that. It was like he was my private relationship. Which was great practice being steadily and only with one person constantly. I haven't had that in a long time so it was comforting to have someone there. He was slowly meeting my friends and I met his but it felt fake because we/I knew there was an end game, (there I go not living in the moment) so we played along like we were so happy just for the sake of "happiness"? I dont know. We did enjoy each other's company because that's all I had until a friend from my past came into the picture and rocked my world that's what caused me to be MIA in 2014. So let the stories begin as I recover and discover what it is I need to change this year.....hello 2015!
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